Oh, Crap. It’s December.

Yes, I’m alive.

And extremely apologetic for taking so long to post ANYTHING.

Truth is, settling in has taken longer than expected. So has getting my behind to the computer store to buy a new laptop (which I just purchased on Monday). So please forgive me.

But I’m (periodically) back in time for the last month – and busiest holiday season – of the year.

Now on top of normal everyday adult shizz, I have to now balance Christmas duties – presents, parties, good cheer, etc. 

I know – first world problems. But, still.

I’ll try to be more consistent with the posting – when I’m not tired or drying out, that is.

I can’t really think of anything to pontificate on (mainly because I’m in a location other than in my apartment in front of my laptop). So for now, I’ll kick off this month with my first random holiday tally of the month.

Ahem ….

2: Number of times I’ve seen snow this week (and lamented the end of fall)

0: Number of decorations hung for Christmas

4 (possibly more): Number of mandatory gifts to buy

0: Number of gifts bought

3: Maximum number of hours I hope to spend shopping at the mall for Christmas

0: Number of Christmas cards written, stuffed and mailed

30: Number of stamps I’ll probably need for aforementioned stamps

300: (Probable) Number of address labels with my old address on them

1: Number of Christmas CDs purchased*

7: Number of holiday parties I have already been invited to**

0: Number of ugly Christmas sweaters worn

3-4: Number of drinks I told my doctor I consume on average, per week (at my recent physical)

4: Number of drinks I’ve already consumed this week

0: Number of those drinks being of a holiday nature (ie. egg nog)

0.5 : Number of Christmas specials watched**

TOO MANY: Number of times I’ve heard Christmas music in stores of any kind since mid-November

That’s all, y’all. I’ll post again soon.

* Hey! It was a Putamayo World Music CD … AND I got it for $1. This is probably the ONLY time this year I’m voluntarily buying Christmas music.

**I might be crashing a party (with a friend of the host’s blessing), which would bring the unofficial number to 8.

 ***Picture courtesy of Good Enough Mother

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D’s 2009 Holiday Tally

I can’t believe 10 days of December have disappeared already!

And – almost overnight – there’s snow and ice on the ground.

How in the sweet HELL did that happen?

Anyhow … since nothing’s really doin’ at the moment, I figured now’s a good a time as any for my annual Christmas tally.

And I KNOW how much you love (no, not really) my Christmas tallies.

So, five days ahead of schedule, here’s how my sprint to Christmas is shaping up so far: 

 

25: Number of cards written, placed in envelopes and mailed (because yes, I’m THAT good)

2: Number of gifts bought

1: Number of gifts wrapped and ready to go

1: Number of gifts half-made (although the way part one came out, I may have to re-do it and donate the original to a worthy cause)

2: Number of gifts intended for gift exchanges this year

2.5: Number of gifts left to purchase (the “0.5” is for my mother, who didn’t want me to buy her anything, after going halfsies with my brother on a new computer for her and my dad. I think I need to sneak something in, SOMEHOW … )

0: Number of Christmas trees erected and decorated at my house (hey! I’ts still early!)

2: Number of times I’ve felt slightly claustrophobic by just BEING in the mall

1: Number of Christmas-themed parties attended

1: pair of new gloves I need to buy, because DAMN the old ones aren’t doing the trick!

1: Number of things I’ve already bought for myself, while trying to shop for other people

$0: Amount of money spent on alcohol for parties

$18:50: Amount of money spent on cab fare, on the way home from a party

So far, so tame, yo.

Tally ho!

And let me know how YOUR Christmas shopping/organizing/partying is going!

D’s 2008 Holiday Tally

gingerbread-menWhile I await more inspiration – and more social opportunities – to make themselves available to me dring the holiday season …

Here’s how my journey towards Christmas this year stacks up against last year’s:

3: Cards successfully mailed

21: Cards successfully written and ready to be mailed

0: Presents completed and wrapped

2: Presents partially completed

3: Presents I still need to buy

At least 2: Number of times I’ve been to the mall to browse for gifts and end up buying something for myself

2: Attempts at baking so far this season

6: Parties I’ve been to in the past week and a half

4 1/2: Parties that were Christmas-related

1: Number of parties crashed

1: Number of times I did the Crawl of Shame from a Christmas party

2: Number of gatherings at restaurants

5: Movies I want to see this holiday season

1: Movies I’ve seen so far

$13.00: the price of admission

Ten days until Christmas and counting … eep!

D’s Grand Holiday Tally

So Christmas Eve is upon us once again. Man – who knew?

Some of my friends have already started the festivities early with dinner and gift exchanges, and others like myself will wait until tomorrow.

I think I managed to survive the pre-season leading up to the big event, but just barely (as is my normal fashion).

Here, for the last time, is a recap of the last three weeks, by the numbers:

22: number of Christmas cards successfully written and mailed

5: number of presents bought (as of 9 a.m. this morning)

(somewhere around) $100: approximate amount of money spent on alcohol

7: number of parties attended

5: number of those parties being Christmas-related

1: number of times ill and hungover as a result of said parties

1: number of backsides I’ve grabbed, on behalf of other people, in the name of Christmas

1: number of times I’ve been bitten on my face by one of my drunk friends (luckily, no broken skin)

$97: amount of money spent on cab rides home from aforementioned parties.

And just think – this is probably the warm-up for New Year’s  … eeesh.

I’ll probably be around somewhere on the World Wide Interweb over the next couple of days.

But if I don’t talk to you before then, happy holidays, everybody! Eat lots of t(of)urkey and get lots of sleep!

D’s Holiday Tally, Take Two

This one’s in honour of my friend who just returned from a week in the balmy Dominican Republic to the cold North American misery we’re dealing with right now.

Here’s what happened last week in my Christmas-season-related life, in numbers: 

16: number of Christmas cards written and mailed (yours is in the mail)

2: number of Christmas cards already received

0: number of presents bought

1: number of possible ideas for family-related gifts

$51: approximate amount of money spent on alcohol

3: number of parties attended

1: number of those parties being Christmas-related

1: number of times ill and hungover as a result of said parties

1: number of backsides I’ve grabbed, on behalf of other people, in the name of Christmas

$77: amount of money spent on cab fare home from aforementioned parties.

And I’m just getting warmed up for this week’s onslaught, which starts later on today.

Hoo boy. That’s scary.

D’s Holiday Tally, Take One

So the holiday season’s starting to rev itself into full gear.

Some of my friends have already finished their shopping and begun their circuit of Christmas parties.

I thought this year would be the one where I’d finally be ahead of schedule.

Hmmm … not so much.

My progress as of December 1st:

$20.88: amount of money spent on stamps to mail Christmas cards

0: number of Christmas cards written and mailed

1: number of Christmas cards already received

0: number of presents bought

$10.95: amount of money spent on alcohol

1: number of parties attended

0: number of those parties being Christmas related

$12: amount of money spent on cab fare home from aforementioned parties.

Boring and ungrateful, you say?

Don’t you worry. The Cheer is comin’. Gimme a few days.